


Sangreal!

by OnceABlueMoon



Category: Arthurian Mythology, Katekyou Hitman Reborn!, Le Morte d'Arthur - Thomas Malory
Genre: Alternate Universe - Royalty, Comedy, Crack, Demon Deals, Dragon teachers Vongola, Enma is the Sword in the Stone, F/M, Hibari is Lancelot, Humor, Like Enma, Living objects, M/M, Magic-Users, Objects are people, Reborn is Merlin, Reborn totally counts, Tags to be added, That's Daniela, Tsuna is Arthur, Wizards, king arthur - Freeform, talking objects
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-07-10
Updated: 2018-03-10
Packaged: 2018-11-30 10:42:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,363
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11461932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnceABlueMoon/pseuds/OnceABlueMoon
Summary: King Arthur AU, in which Enma is stuck in a stone for some reason and only Tsuna can free him. Who let Hibari be Lancelot? The wizard Reborn may know.Also, sentient swords: "Sir... You are holding my butt."





	1. Chapter 1: King Iemitsu Messes Up

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Katekyo Hitman Reborn or Le Morte d'Arthur

Back in the old days, when King Iemitsu still reigned, the lovely Lady Nana declared she was to be a nun. Her suitors cried out and though she was moved, she did not change her mind.

‘’This has nothing to do with all of ye,’’ she swore with her hand upon her heart, ‘’It is my father, you see. He won’t let me go, and I shan’t wait forever.’’

And so, she made way to the nunnery, as slow as she could, for she was sorry to say goodbye to the promise of children and a husband to love.  Her father accompanied her, and they stayed in many castles, but the largest and most famous among them was the King’s dwelling place. He was not among her suitors, for the King was a busy man and rarely had the time for silly dalliances, whatever his constable, the mighty Lady Lal Mirch, might say about his escapades.

And as in all great romances, Lady Nana had barely passed the gates of his homestead, or the King was in love, smitten on first sight. ‘’Her hair, so soft,’’ he sighed, ‘’And her eyes, jewels that make the stars seem dim in comparison!’’

‘’Do your work, you rascal,’’ Lady Lal said and smacked him with a parchment roll.

By the fourteenth day of his whining, she was using less affectionate terms for him. ‘’If ye don’t shut your Royal trap right this minute, sir, I will take up my blade and shut it for you! I shan’t have a babbling buffoon for Lord King!’’

‘’But her laugh, my Lady! It bubbles like a brook, watering the drought I carry in me! And her character, oh, her commendable character! It is so warm, my Lady, that I fear I will perish in the cold if I cannot have her as my Queen!’’

And his whining wroth the Lady Lal so, that she called upon the wizard Reborn at once. At least then the circus would be amusing, was a general opinion. Lal was terribly fond of Reborn, which might give you an idea of his fearsome reputation.

Lo and behold, the wizard came to court.

‘’Reborn,’’ the King wailed, ‘’I am sick with love for the fair Lady Nana! Convince her father, so that he gives her unto me as a bride!’’

The wizard stared at him blankly.

Iemitsu pouted. ‘’…Please?’’

The court held their breath.

Agonizingly slow, the wizard tapped his bottom lip. ‘’Hmm….’’ Reborn’s eyes glinted beadily, the endless black holes swirling, ready to devour. The corners of his mouth curled up.

A shudder worked his way down the King’s spine.

‘’Only if you give me your firstborn.’’

Now, as many of us know, this deal is not one made easily. But Reborn felt like drama today, so this game it was. A colleague had recommended it to him. Great entertainment! They’d said, crying mothers, suffering fathers, misery all around, and the succulent cherry on top: Stupidity punished! As to what Reborn would do with the brat… He knew how to go about creating a great (and amusing) King.

But as always, King Iemitsu was a bit too hasty and gave his resounding: ‘’Agreed!’’ before Reborn had even finished his sentence.

‘’I’m surprised you aren’t busy, Sir Reborn, when you hand out such great deals!’’

* * *

And so the great wizard Reborn made way for the wedding to be held- some said it was a ‘’shotgun wedding’’ though what a shotgun was was not clear, only that it was an object of great terror and magic, and that it was held to the head of Nana’s sire as he walked her down the aisle. Why this apparently was not the right term either, according to the Lady Lal, was a mystery as well.

Then again, both Lady Lal and the wizard Reborn were magicians, and though Lady Lal had long lost her powers, she still knew the secrets of the magical arts and all its curious twists and turns.

* * *

Nine months later, a baby popped out, and the Lady Nana was joyous beyond belief until it turned out her husband had promised him to the wizard Reborn already.

‘’He is my child,’’ she declared, ‘’From my lap, he sprouted, so with me, he shall stay!’’

‘’Your husband made a deal, my lady,’’ the great wizard said, ‘’But not to worry, I will make him a great King one day, the kind your idiot husband could never be.’’

So in the end, she had to let him go. She cried every night and her tears were a blight upon the land. With every drop that hit the earth, the curse of the childless Queen became worse. The sun stopped shining, the birds quit singing, and the people began to cry for the little Prince to return. But none of it moved the wizard, and war befell the weakened country.

* * *

As to what happened to the Prince?

You must know, that in the North of the great country of Italy, a great noble House Vongola lived and whatever rumor you might’ve heard, dragonslayers they were not. On the contrary, indeed! They educated dragons, if a little heavy-handed. The head of the House, the knight Daniela, was the best teacher of them all. Years ago, when she heard of the young King Iemitsu Pendragon’s misbehavior, she instantly knew that the Royal House had given in to their dragon-y tendencies again and that her expertise was needed.

So she had sent her son, Sir Timoteo, to teach the King a lesson. Sadly, however, the King was fond of feasts, and since his wife had taken to crying all day long, he threw one party after another in an attempt to raise her spirits.

Forget party like it’s 1999, party like it’s the Middle Ages-  The noise pollution was so bad, that the neighboring countries grew tired of complaining and declared war on Britain.

Timoteo, the long-suffering knight, rode to battle after his sire, with his three eldest sons at his side. None of them returned. The King was dead, the Prince was gone, the Queen inconsolable, and the only members the House Vongola had left were the knight Daniela and her angry toddler of a grandson.

It was there that the wizard Reborn brought the Prince. Daniela took one look inside the bundle cradled in arms and whistled. ‘’Quite the dragon you’ve got there, old friend.’’

Reborn winced. ‘’Tell me something I don’t know. Your son, may he rest in peace, suppressed the boy’s magical power at birth because he kept setting the Royal drapes aflame.’’

Daniela crossed herself. ‘’May the Lord be with me, I’ll take on another dragon of a child!’’

And so, the Lady Vongola nourished not only her own explosive grandson but also raised the little spitfire the wizard brought her. Not knowing any better, the boys called each other brother. 

A country kingless, a boy unknowing, adventures lying just beyond the corner, waiting to be discovered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m a King Arthur nut and doing a big project for it at school (kinda like a thesis, only for high school). I was reading Le Morte d’Arthur by Thomas Mallory and got to the part about Sir Kay and Arthur being brothers and the Sword being pulled from the stone, and I thought, with my fangirl sensibilities: Hey, what if that were Xanxus and Tsuna respectively? And then this happened. 
> 
> A lot of the story was changed around to fit the characters. Timoteo might have been the best fit for Sir Ector, as he is Xanxus father, but I felt like having a kickass dragon lady, so Daniela ‘’fought like Athena’’ Vongola it was. I love Ottavo!
> 
> Sangreal, the title, is an old word for the Holy Grail (fun fact: It’s pretty much saint and grail put together ;P). It’s the title because I like old words and because one of the biggest jokes of this fic is centered around the Sangreal, the Sword in the Stone and Excalibur (which aren’t the same). 
> 
> Also, shameless advertising here, [IWP-chan](http://archiveofourown.org/users/IWP_chan/pseuds/IWP_chan) and I created a collection, [0027 Population Project](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/0027PopulationProject), which, as the name says, has the goal of writing more fics with 0027 and making the pairing popular! If you’ve written any fics with 0027, don’t hesitate to add it, we love any and all 0027! If you’ve read any good fics involving the pairing, don’t be shy either, we love to hear about everything!
> 
> Next chapter: Swords appear in inconvenient places and Tsuna meets the shy Enma (who, for some reason, is stuck in a stone).


	2. In Which Sir Tsuna Gropes a Sword By Accident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In Which Sir Tsuna Gropes a Sword By Accident, Xanxus had a farting contest with Squalo and the wizard Reborn holds Conversations of Great Importance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  **Disclaimer:** I don’t own Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

‘’Wizard Reborn, are ye certain this is the right path to take? Is this truly as God dictated it?’’ The Archbishop of Canterbury rubbed his hands.

‘’As certain as the path of my bullet towards the brain of idiots.’’

The Archbishop shifted from foot to foot, nervously tugging at his habit ‘’I’m not familiar with that term, o Wizard, but…. Is it not a hindrance? The mass will come in at any moment!’’

Reborn looked up from his nails, flicked non-existent dirt off them, raised an eyebrow and glanced meaningfully down the aisle. There, directly against the high altar, was a great stone, in which a cold iron anvil as well a sword, was buried.

Make no mistakes- it was placed in front of the altar stairs.

‘’It’s for the good of Britain.’’

‘’But I can’t go up the stairs!’’

‘’Well, that is your problem, is it not?’’

Smirking, Reborn strutted away.

* * *

After the death of King Iemitsu, the realm was in jeopardy for a long time. While some said the King had an heir, others emphasized the past tense in that particular sentence. Why else would the Queen be childless? The babe must have died before it took its first breath!

Nobody dared to ask the Queen, though- she had Opinions. Highly dangerous, in a Lady, all agreed. For all Lady Nana was lovely, she was vicious too. If the Queen would have heard of this, she surely would have smote them where they stood!

But the Queen was a widow now, on top of losing her only child, and her husband's death had hurt her so deeply that she retreated into her own skin, only laughing airily, sweetly, at nothing. She was a husk of the grand Queen she’d once been. Her eyes were blank, vivacity forlorn, only ever responding to her dear friend Lady Lal.

The Lords all desired the Crown like no other, so they could not agree on the man that should ascend the throne. The one thing they did agree on was that wedding the Queen was not necessary in order to become King, for many of the Lords were wed already, and none of them were about to give up their claim to the crown.

In court, Lady Lal reigned with an iron fist, in the hope of aiding the Queen, but her first and foremost duties had always been to the Royal Army, and she was not prepared for the work the court took. Highly adaptable as she was, she survived the honey-coated poison of the court and learned subterfuge of her own, but not without a price. The army, without a king _or_ a constable, was torn apart into fractions, one for each lord, loyalties shifting quicker than the sand in an hourglass.

And so it was. The Court around a grief-stricken Queen, the constable poker-faced, desperately trying to keep up appearances, and the army lost to all of them.

Fourteen years passed by, and still, the lords were warring amongst themselves. So on the morn before Christmas eve, the wizard Reborn spoke to the Archbishop: ‘’Send for all the Lords and men of might, and tell them they must come to this very church on the first Christmas day, upon the pain of cursing! A miracle will come, to show us the rightwise King of Britain!’’

As he said, it was.

* * *

On the eve of Christmas day, all Lords came to mass. Gape, they did.

The Sword in the Stone was a miracle, indeed! Upon the hilt stood in golden letters: ‘’Whoso pulls this Sword from the Stone and Anvil, is the rightwise King of all of England.’’

As one, the Lords moved in on their prey: The blade that would crown them better than any Royal headdress could! It was there, in the church, who could have put it there but God? The mighty Lord high in the heavens? Surely, they were meant to pull it from the stone!

Elbowing and pushing each other to the side, they worked their way forward, but before any one of them could touch the stone with avaricious claws, the Archbishop threw himself before the stone, arms spread, and thundered: ‘’Are you insane?! Blasphemy, this is! Go sit in the pews, ye dogs!’’

With big eyes, the Lords drooped off and did as he said.  The archbishop crossed his arms. ‘’Never have I e _ver_ seen any gentlemen behave so rambunctiously in the house of the Lord! Shame on you, Lords, shame on you!’’

He narrowed his eyes at them, stabbing his finger in the air. ‘’Ye will sit, ye will listen, and NONE will touch the Sword before the high mass is over! Now, obey!’’

They did.

* * *

‘’My Queen, the sword I spoke of to you, none of the Lords have been able to pull it.’’ Lal kneeled before Queen Nana.

The woman in question sat on her chair before the window, hands folded in her lap, features drawn and tired, staring empty-eyed at the city beyond the glass.

Lady Lal took one of her hands. ‘’Milady, the archbishop declared there is to be a tournament on New Year's day, for both the nobles and the common men. Whoever wins gets the chance to try their fortune upon pulling the blade from the Stone, for the Archbishop trusts the Lord Almighty to let the True King may win. But I fear what will happen to you, Milady, if anyone _were_ to remove it, yet I am also concerned with the fact that the Stone did not judge a single one of the Lords worthy! There was no proper king amongst them! What kind of Lords does this godforsaken kingdom sport?!’’

Slowly, Lady Nana turned her head. Sitting there, in her nightgown, hair loose and draping against the back of the chair, no crown in sight, the Queen painted a picture so vulnerable that Lady Lal could not help but clutch her heart to prevent it from breaking. There were very few things that had managed to wedge themselves through her armour, both steel and metaphorical, but the ruin of this magnificent woman was one of them.

Lady Nana’s voice was no louder than a whisper, as easily blown away by a breeze as the dead autumn leaves long gone. ‘’There is no proper king, for none of them are my son.’’

With a sharp intake of breath, Lady Lal could not do a thing but bite back her tears, and raise her hand to cup the Queen’s face, rubbing her thumb in gentle circles across her cheek. ‘’Nana…’’

The Queen’s bottom lip quivered, her grip on Lal’s other hand tightening. ‘’I _miss_ him.’’

Lady Lal got up and pressed the Queen against[l her, embracing her. Resting her cheek on Lady Nana’s head, she pretended not to notice the tears wetting her shoulder as Lady Nana buried her nose in her neck. Running a hand through Nana’s hair, she closed her eyes, breathing in the smell of clean soap and saltern sadness.

With a lump in her throat, she spoke. ‘’I know, milady, I know.’’

* * *

‘’You had a _farting contest_ with Squalo and lost control of your magic?!’’ Tsuna stared at the lumpy remains of his brother’s sword incredulously.

Xanxus sniffed, picking at his nails. ‘’Obviously, trash. Now fetch me a new sword.’’

With half a mind to set Xanxus’ ass on fire, Tsuna stalked out of the tent to get a new sword, kicking the table on his way out for the good measure. If he didn’t deliver, he’d be known as the brother of the guy who farted his sword right out of existence. Great start to the new year, really. Note the sarcasm. He groaned, rubbing his temples.

Xanxus was a dirty, lazy bastard, who knew exactly how to exploit Tsuna’s weak spots.

A farting contest with Squalo? Of all the ridiculous New Years day’s traditions they’d had made up as kids to hold on to… And on such an important day too!

Knowing their grandmother, Daniela would simply have given Xanxus the Eyebrow for losing control with his magic during, but she was already in the crowd and as such, no help at all. (Please don’t let her hear that thought- she could _smell_ insubordination).

Honestly, he pitied the guy who found the still-steaming (and stinky) half-melted remains of the sword. Better to get out of there quickly and avoid being the one to clean _that_ disaster up.

He looked up, the sound of the clocktower bells ringing in his ears. He bit his lip. Damn it, only ten minutes left.

Tsuna was late, late, late and if he did not find a replacement for Xanxus’ sword before the tournament began, his social life would be over.

* * *

…Why was there a sword in the churchyard? Never mind- he’d seen stranger things. When your elderly grandmother, only walking straight with sheer stubbornness, beat down dragons for a living, your view of life tended to get a bit skewed.

Running past the pews, Tsuna scaled the stone to the huge anvil, hoisting himself up. He studied the blade, coloured brightly by the huge stained window above the altar, depicting the  Virgin Mary with Baby Jesus.

Curses! The sword was stuck in the anvil, the hilt the only thing above the stone!

The clock tower rang again.

…Tsuna did not have TIME for this sword to be stuck! He threw himself onto the anvil, grabbed the hilt, and _pulled._

The bell stopped ringing, and an oppressive silence spread through the huge building, only broken by the _zing_ of metal sliding against metal as the blade was separated from the anvil. Dumbfounded, Tsuna stared at the sword in his hands, gleaming prettily in the morning light.

…Never mind. He had no time for this. He had to get it to Xanxus! Turning to slide down the rock, he-

‘’Sir… You are holding my butt.’’

Tsuna blanched, jerking to steady himself. Regaining his balance, he looked to the left, he looked to the right, behind him, afore him, but no living soul other than him dwelled within the church.

‘’Sir,’’ it came again, ‘’Would you please be so kind as to release it? This is… Um… intimate.’’

Was someone hiding underneath the stone? It couldn’t be the sword, right? Tsuna scratched the back of his neck.

The blade heated up underneath his hand. ‘’Sir, please do not be so forward! The butt of a sword is truly the butt!’’

It- The sword- it-

This couldn’t be happening.

So just as he always did when he was at loss, Tsuna panicked,  dropped any and all things in his hands and screamed.

‘’HIEEEEEEEEEEEE!’’ With a swooping sensation in his gut, Tsuna fell backwards, off the stone. The harsh landing punched the air out his lungs, the stone floor cold against his cheek.

The sword clattered down beside him.

As if the devil was on his heels, Tsuna scrambled backwards, bumped his head harshly against the pews, and then hastily hid behind them.

‘’…I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you,’’ The voice was soft and gentle this time. ‘’My name is Enma.’’

Tsuna peeked around the corner of the pews, warily eying the sword. But be as it may, etiquette dictated he was to state his name when another gave them theirs, and he would not dishonour the name of Vongola by not doing so. Even if it concerned a sword stuck in a stone.

…Formerly, that was. Because Tsuna _pulled it out._

Shivering, he stood up, straightened his back, and shuffled towards the sword again, where it lay in the middle of the aisle, sun reflecting off its shiny surface.

‘’I am Tsunayoshi di Vongola, son of Sir Timoteo. Whose…’’ Tsuna hesitated, ‘’Offspring are you?’’

‘’Well, my full name would be Enma Kozato Simon, Holy Sword in the Stone, son of God, for he forged me.’’

…Forged by GOD?!

Feeling like there was a yawning hole beneath his feet, Tsuna fainted.

From behind the huge church doors, the Wizard Reborn sighed, and stood up to walk towards what would be the Rightful King of England. Prodding the downed boy-King with his boot-clad toes, the wizard Reborn pouted. He had expected an aneurysm at least.

From the floor, Enma squicked, ‘’Sire, would you please help sir Tsunayoshi? He is… indisposed at the moment.’’

Reborn waved him away, enchanting a scarf left on the pews to pick the Holy Sword up. ‘’I am aware, Sir Enma. I had hoped the whole thing would’ve been more amusing, but for some reason, your guard knights are missing.’’

The sword, now snugly wrapped up, chirped. ‘’They went out to win the tournament! They wouldn’t let anybody touch me!’’

Reborn snorted as he lifted sir Tsuna of the floor. ‘’Depriving me of my entertainment by not battling the little prince _and_ abandoning their posts. They’re not very good at guarding you, are they?’’

Enma let out a surprised sound. ‘’But they aren’t guarding _me_ , great wizard!’’

Reborn raised his eyebrow, hoisting sir Tsuna up over his shoulder. ‘’Then what, pray tell, are they defending, if not you?’’

‘’That would be my virtue, sir.’’

‘’…The Lady Adel’s idea, wasn’t it?’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In Le Morte d’Arthur, it says that the stone was placed ‘’in the churchyard, against the high altar,’’. The high altar in a big church, as this church likely would have been, would be rather high. The stairs would be rather broad, most likely, but for the sake of the story, they were narrow in this case. The image made me laugh, anyway.
> 
> Writing this chapter took very long, because however much I wanted to write the next part, something was missing. When a lovely anon on Tumblr send me an incredibly sweet ask abou[t my LalNana stories](http://archiveofourown.org/works?utf8=%E2%9C%93&work_search%5Bsort_column%5D=revised_at&work_search%5Brelationship_ids%5D%5B%5D=19111446&work_search%5Bother_tag_names%5D=&work_search%5Bquery%5D=&work_search%5Blanguage_id%5D=&work_search%5Bcomplete%5D=0&commit=Sort+and+Filter&fandom_id=244259&user_id=OnceABlueMoon), I realized I had completely forgotten what to do with Lal after the first chapter. Which was a shame, so she came to hit me up the head and protect Nana!
> 
> I had a lot of fun with this chapter!

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to squeal with me: this is my [Tumblr](https://onceabluemoonwrites.tumblr.com/).


End file.
